I Hope a Woman Don't Peek in Here

**GroundsKeeper** · 01-13-2003, 08:51 AM

[align=center]Girls Night Out[/align]

>> The other night,

>> I was invited out for a night with,

>> "The Girls".

>> I told my husband that I would be
home by midnight,

>> Well, the hours passed and the
champagne was going down way too
easy,

>> Around 3 a.m.,

>> drunk as a skunk,

>> I headed for home,

>> Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo
clock in the hall started up and
cuckooed 3 times,

>> Quickly, realizing he'd probably wake
up, I cuckooed another 9 times,

>> I was really proud of myself for coming
up with such a quick-witted solution,
(even when smashed), in order to
escape a possible conflict with him,

>> The next morning my husband asked
me what time I got in, and I
told him12:00,

>> He didn't seem disturbed at all,

>> WHeeeW!

>> Got away with that one,

>> Then he said,

>> "We need a new cuckoo clock",

>> When I asked him why, he said,

>> "Well, last night our clock cuckooed
three times, then said, "OH
CRAP," cuckooed 4 more
times, cleared its throat, cuckooed
another 3 times, giggled, cuckooed
twice more, and then tripped over
the cat and farted.

peek-a-boo

[Edited on 1-13-2003 by GroundsKeeper]

**GroundsKeeper** · 01-13-2003, 09:14 AM

[align=center]Firehouse Bells[/align]
>> A Fireman came home from work one day and told his wife,

>> "You know, we have a wonderful system at the fire station?

>> BELL 1 rings and we all put on our jackets,

>> BELL 2 rings and we all slide down the pole,

>> BELL 3 rings and we're on the fire truck ready to go.

>> "From now on when I say BELL 1, I want you to strip naked.

>> When I say BELL 2, I want you to jump in bed.

>> And when I say BELL 3, we are going to make love all night."

>> The next night he came home from work and yelled "BELL 1!"

>> The wife promptly took all her clothes off.

>> When he yelled "BELL 2!", the wife jumped into bed.

>> When he yelled "BELL 3!", they began making love.

>> After a few minutes the wife
yelled "BELL 4!"

>> "What the hell is BELL 4?" asked the husband?

>> she replied,

>> "ROLL OUT MORE HOSE, YOU'RE NOWHERE NEAR THE FIRE![/b]

[Edited on 1-13-2003 by GroundsKeeper]